Nothing compares to your grace and glory O Lord.

... It amazes me how God works in our lives... even when were not looking. 

 

There is the saying that when we least expect it, we fall in love and find the one we will spend our life with.... Well, while I wasn't looking I have fallen back in love with God.... 

I have always kept a relationship with Him, but over the past few years I have done an amazing job at destroying it from where it once was. 

I have done and become something I said I never would...

I don't think I'm a bad person or ever have been in the eyes of most people who roam my life... but I think as humans we should have expectations for ourselves just as we do for people who enter our life... and for the past few years i have come very short of meeting those expectations of myself. 

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people tell me, 'Well I'm not a christian, but I'm a good person... and I believe in God' ... but isn't that like saying, ' I have a car and I take good care of it, and even though I know it needs gas to run... I'm not going to put any in it, and hope i get where i need to go?.'  

Our relationship with God, just like any other relationship... requires work! I wouldn't be in a relationship with someone who only came to see me once a week and only talked to me one or two times a week (if that!), I would question their devotion to me... I would question their willingness to do what it takes to make our relationship work... and I in NO way want God to question that of me. 

God has poured blessings on me beyond what I could ever tell you... everything i have has only been given to be by His blessings. There is no way that I could explain to you, looking back... how i have afforded to always live in a nice home or have nice clothing, to ALWAYS have what I need and most everything I  want... to be given the chance at an education that will afford me a comfortable living for myself as well as my future family, to have the amazing friends in my life that I do.. ones who have been my family when my actual family could not be or was not there for me.... all of these things have only  been given to me by the pure grace of God. 

I could bleed my heart out with thanks to him for days and not come close in giving Him the thanks he deserve... and yet I have continuously lived a lifestyle that took me away from Him... a lifestyle that did not show my thankfulness to Him. I have lived a life depending on myself for things and not laying my burdens at His feet... I have ran the opposite way in the paths He has show me... I have worked on every relationship in my life besides the one that matters most... the relationship with my Savior. 

Despite my past and the many times I have fallen short of what He has expected; he continually blesses me... he continually answers my prayers and shelters me... 

I want nothing more in my life from this day forward than to spend every waking moment thanking God for never turning His back on me or forsaking me as I have done to Him. I can do nothing but spend all of my days working on my relationship with Him... 

It is an amazing feeling to fall back in love with the one who will never leave me, the one who loves me unconditionally, the one who is there for me every waking moment... 

I am eternally grateful. 

Jesus, I surrender
I draw nearer, I fall down
Master, be my Savior
Be my shelter, be my God